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Sunday, September 23, 2012

Ridding of Insecurities = Big Head

A big headed person sculptured by Thomas Lerooy in Brussels, Belgium
photo courtesy of  Chavannes

I really don’t know what happened and I don’t think that I did wrong to somebody else, I am actually trying to be as friendly as possible to everyone because I wanted to change the bad attitude I had before as suddenly I felt that being friends with everyone will be less stressful but suddenly there are group of person who seems not to like me.

One day, I was in the locker room and of course I’m trying to fix my stuff there as I am a bit OC with the arrangement of it when suddenly I felt somebody stopped from walking and stayed on my back, I looked at this person as I thought it’ll be somebody I used to know but then, I was wrong; the person is so new to me and the strangest thing that the person did is stared at me from head to toe and walks out and after a moment a friend of that person walks in front of me too and did the same way. I was mesmerized. Who are these people? I can’t recall if I did something wrong to them… that incident made my day worse.

Another instance is when I went to the comfort room and this flock of gays is there, I just don’t mind them as I didn’t know them at first. But as I wash my hands one of them were looking at me, I just don’t mind him at first but as I looked to that man again he is still looking at me with a sarcastic smile. It made me so conscious “why is this man looking at me that way?” and I also been with them in the elevator and they’re like talking to each other like “you’re just a newbie and yet you already have an attitude” and I don’t know if they are pertaining to me but one thing is for sure, they are making sure that I’m gonna hear it. After that Incidence I did a research and I found out that these gays are also new to the company, just 2 months earlier than of me.

I am not telling this story just to tell everyone that I am the protagonist of the story. I just wanted to tell everyone that insecurity is not healthy and bragging that you are better to that person is like having big head unless that person is disrespecting your position right? I know that I might be intimidating thus not all of the people will like me but please if the person is not doing anything to you then leave them alone, we should act like professional right? We were educated and we should apply it in any circumstances and if that person is really hitting below the belt and that would be the right time to act like one. 

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